Hotband is driving me to work this morning.
As usual, I am craning my neck around, looking at the back of cars.
"You just love looking at bumper stickers, don't you, Babe," he says.
"I just feel like you learn a lot about people by the bumper stickers on their cars. For example, this truck in front of us. I can tell they are a football fan, by the Bucs mudflaps. They obviously have a teenager because they have that bumpersticker that says 'Hire a Teenager While They Still Know Everything". I would be inclined to say that their teenager plays sports, because of the #73 with a high school logo on their back windshield. And see? They have a 'Rams' high school insignia too, which tells me that their teenager more than likely plays football for the Ridgewood Rams."
"And we need to know this, why exactly?"
"Well, for identification purposes."
"Um, why would you need to identify them?"
"Let's say that this person suddenly smashed into a person as they were crossing the street. All of a sudden, WHOOOOOOOOOSH...they take off! The person is left in the road, dying, bleeding to death! I would have to get out and help them! I have no knowledge of cars at all, but I would be able to tell police that it is a brown and grey Dodge truck. An old one. And I could tell them that the people have a teenage kid. And I can tell them that they probably are Buc fans! And, I could also tell the police that they have a teenage son, #73, on the Ridgewood Rams football team! With all that information, they'd be able to pick up the driver of the truck in no time and the case would be solved!"
I am absolutely beaming, having a very well thought out answer that I believed to be extremely impressive. My husband appeared to be amazed as well. He was completely silent, obviously in awe of his brilliant and observant wife. It as a few moments before he actually spoke again. I waited with bated breath for him to praise me for my astute observations.
"I think you've been watching too much CSI lately."